Two Girls Two Ships CHAOS MUHAHAHA
by Dragon of Dusk
Summary: ON HOLD Me and my best friend fall into the Pirate world! Oh noes! Poor Jack Sparrow and Davy Jones are going to have problems! Muhahahahaha cough um...yeah this is a crack fic lol...might get a little serious once inawhile though...
1. Falling falling falling XD

**A/N: HELLO EVERYONE! And welcome to the madness of my mind! Muhahahahaha! I hope thou shalt enjoy this…cause I know that I had fun writing it!**

**Disclaimer: -mumble- I won't say it….I won't…BAH! I don't own anyone from Pirates ok! There I said it. –Goes off and sulks-**

XXXXXXXXXXX

CHAPTER ONE FOO"S!

Two 16 year old girls sat side by side on a blue couch in the middle of a living room…that happened to be the girl on the right's home.

The girl on the right, Brittney, looked over at her best friend Jordan.

They both just stared at each other until.

"So…What do yah wanna do?" Brittney yawned in boredom.

Jordan gave her a confused look. "I don't know…What do you want to do?"

"I don't know—HEY!" Brittney glared at the red head who grinned sheepishly back at her. Brittney growled then pouted. "Oh fine…I guess we could um…" the brunette looked around for something to give her an idea.

Jordan noticed her friend's dilemma and began to look around too. She spotted Brittney's Pirates of the Caribbean movie and grinned evilly. "I know! Let's play Pirates!"

The brunette gave Jordan a sarcastic look. "Ok sure! Do we have any "pirate clothes"?"

Jordan thought for a second. "Um…no?"

"Do we have any really big ships?"

"Erm…no…"

"Do we live anywhere near an ocean or sea?"

"…no…"

"And do we have any treasure to plunder?"

"…….no…"

Brittney nodded with a sarcastic smile. "Well then. Now you see my point."

Jordan was the one to pout this time. Brittney looked at the red head and suddenly felt guilt, she too had wanted to play pirates but she had been sarcastic and logical at the same time.

"Oh…All right…" Jordan perked up, "…but…" Jordan's face fell. "…we have to be outside when we play it…and I have to be able to have my iPod." Brittney finished then cuddled her iPod.

Jordan slowly began to scoot away from her iPod obsessed companion.

After a few moments of iPod crazed silence, both girls hopped up and ran to the door. Brittney stopped for a second and clipped her iPod case (with her iPod in it) onto her belt with a bit of difficulty then swung the door open.

Jordan was the first to walk out and she waited impatiently for Brittney who, somehow, had gotten a little tangled up with her headphones.

Brittney stumbled out and bumped into Jordan. They both stumbled then fell into a HUGE hole.

Brittney and Jordan screamed on the top of their lungs as the tumbled down the black abyss.

XxX

Jordan was still screaming when she landed HARD on her backside.

"Ooooo ouchie!" She groaned and rubbed her soar butt.

Jordan heard voices and looked around. Lots of people were standing around her and staring at her. But Brittney wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"Um…Hi?" Jordan smiled nervously and waved her hand.

She also then took note that she was on a ship. "Oooo! Cool!" Forgetting that everyone was staring at her, Jordan jumped up and dashed over to the stern. On her way there she rammed into someone.

Jordan squeaked as she fell backwards.

"WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING YO--" Jordan looked up to see none other then Captain Jack Sparrow standing in front of her with one brow arched.

Jordan sat there for a second then jumped up and tackled Jack in a glomp. "OMG! It's like you! It's really YOU!"

Jack made a panicky face and looked at Mr. Gibbs for help. Jordan continued to crush him in a hug with hearts for eyes.

She then let go of him and just stared at him. "You're like Jack Sparrow, pardon, Captain Jack Sparrow and like you're so cool and stuff and it was soo cool the way you act and stuff and this means that I'm on the Black Pearl and oh man this is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cool and I wonder what Brittney is doing and and man and I like wonder what you all are doing now and how a hole appeared in front of B's house but but man its like you, THE Captain Jack Sparrow and man I thought that I'd never live to see this day but I have so yeah and and and and dude this is way to cool for words yet I keep talking and and I LOVE YOU!" Jordan gasped and fainted from lack of air.

Jack looked down at the red haired girl with an 'Ok I'm really creeped out' face. "Well…what'd ya know…she knocked herself out…"

Mr. Gibbs looked down at her as well. "Apparently so…"

XxX

Brittney wasn't as lucky as Jordan when it came to landing for two reasons.

One she landed on her stomach and two…the floor was covered in what seemed to be hard coral.

The brunette swore in pain and slowly got up. As she dusted herself off, she noticed feet coming into her view…quiet a lot of feet too. She also noted that Jordan wasn't there.

Brittney's mind went somewhere else though as her hand touched her iPod case. She completely forgot about the feet and her friend not being with her and screeched in horror.

"NOOOOOOO! Not my baby!" She pulled it off of her belt and checked it over to make sure it wasn't damaged. Brittney sighed in relief to see that no harm had come to her iPod.

She clipped it back onto her belt happily and took a few steps forward and walked right into what felt like a brick wall. Brittney seemed to slowly peel away from what ever it was with swirly eyes and drool coming out of the side of her mouth.

Brittney fell back and her butt got the same treatment as her front with the coral and all.

Grumbling, Brittney looked up to see what the heck she had just bumped into. Her jaw unhinged.

Normally she would have sworn at what ever she had bumped into but in this instance she was speechless…for about two seconds. "Holy –BEEP-! You…You're Davy Jones! THE DAVY JONES!"

True enough, Davy Jones stood in front of her with a confused/glaring face on.

"This has to be a dream, there is no way it can be real unless I'm in one of those realistic dream thingies but normally they turn out to be nightmares and I don't like nightmares and this doesn't look like a nightmare, it looks like one of my most treasured dreams and--" Brittney had to stop there and catch her breath.

She just stared at him for a little longer then a happy grin spread across her face and she fainted.

The guy with the sharky face walked up to Davy. "What do ye want us to do with her Captain?"

Davy looked at him then the odd girl at his feet. "Put 'er in the brig fer now." He growled and walked off. Sharky looked at his Captain in confusion then picked up the girl.

This was going to be very interesting.

XxX

**A/N: WOO HOO! –runs around in hyper circles-**

**Jordan: -sigh- sorry everyone…she's had a little too much chocolate today…**

**Me: OOOOO! See the almighty purple button in the corner? Huh huh? Do yah? Click it please and leave messages! AND CANDY! –gets smacked upside the head with a fish-**

**Jordan: just R&R please please.**


	2. Getting to know Red

**A/N: Hi again Hi again! XD This chappy is only about Jordan. Next one'll be meh :P**

**NOTE: FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE TAKING THIS STORY SERIOUSLY…PLEASE DON"T…IT"S SUPPOUSED TO BE STUPID AND CRAP LIKE THAT! -heart- THANK YOU XD**

**SappireLight: I'm glad you like it XD more is to come very soon!**

**PhantomFreak1215: erm…ok…mind actually TELLING me what you want me to fix next time? And message me if you want to tell me to fix things k? X3**

**Disclaimer: NO! Must-not-say…words! I DON"T OWN POTC! –Sob-**

CHAPTER TWO ARR!

Jack was giving the unconscious red head nervous looks. But then again…voting to have her rest in his room was probably not to bright of an idea on his part.

He picked up his bottle of rum and looked in it.

It was empty.

Jack groaned and put the bottle down. "The rum is always gone when I need it." He stood up and swayed abit, then looked to where the girl was supposed to be.

Emphasis on the WAS supposed to be. She wasn't there anymore.

Jack looked around in panic, his heart began to beat faster and he took a few steps forward, quiet oblivious to the eyes that bored into him from behind.

Goose bumps ran up Jack's spine as he continued to look around…when suddenly…

"HI JACK!"

Jack literally jumped out of his boots, hit his head on the ceiling, fell back into his boots, and then fell over from shock.

Jordan blinked and looked down at him. "Erm…Jack you ok?"

Jack was clutching his heart afraid that it would burst from his chest at any moment and looked up at the strange girl that fell from the sky. "Oi' don't do that! Savvy?" Jordan blinked in confusion but nodded.

As Jack sat up, he noted that the girl knew who he was but no one seemed to know who she was. "So um...ye got a name there missy?"

Jordan grinned from ear to ear. "The name's Jordan!"

"Ah…and…may I ask what you are wearing?"

Said red head frowned and looked down at her cloths. She was wearing a normal t-shirt and jeans…what was so weird about that.

"Um…jeans and a shirt…why?"

Jack tilted his head. "Jeans? What's that?"

Jordan began to laugh hard. "It's what I'm wearing silly!" Jack looked her up and down.

"Oh…" He picked himself up off the floor and looked at her. "Um…are ye going to stay here or come with me?"

Jordan stopped laughing and looked at him confused. Jack was standing by the door of his cabin and was looking at her. "Er…sure…where are we going?" She smiled goofily and followed him out of the room.

Jack swayed with the ship as he walked down a flight of stairs. "To get me some more rum, mate." Jordan made a face but followed him none the less.

They both were soon sitting on barrels with rum bottles in hand.

Jordan didn't drink any of hers but just watched as Jack practically downed his in one gulp.

"Ahhh, well now that we're here, I'd like to know of how you came to be on me ship luv." Jack stared at her.

Jordan thought for a second. "Well…me and Brittney, my best friend, were making plans to take over Russia when we both got bored and wanted to do something so I suggested that we play Pirates and she said some …erm…oh logical things then I pouted and she decided that we could play as long as she had her iPod, she's obsessed with the thing, and we went outside only to fall into this huge hole and I wound up here and I have no bloody idea where she is at the moment." Jordan gasped for air.

Jack blinked. Never before had he met someone who would try to explain something really long in one sentence/one breath. "Well…that's interesting…"

Jordan smiled happily and, without thinking, took a big gulp of her rum.

Jack watched as her face went blank and a flush came to her cheeks. Jordan began to giggle uncontrollably and swayed on her seat. "WHEEEEEEE! Lol! This issss funed!" she laughed and fell off of her seat.

Jack peeked over some barrels and noted that she was out cold. "Oi…Never knew that someone could get that drunk that fast…"

Jordan suddenly popped back up with a happy face on. "I wanna do something! I wanna…I wanna be hyper!" She screamed and ran out of the room yelling like a maniac and singing songs that Jack had never heard of before.

"JUMP AROUND JUMP AROUND JUMP UP JUMP UP A GET DOWN!" Jordan sang happily on the top of her lungs while swinging from the mast.

The crew all stared at her like as though she were mad.

Jordan noticed a barrel and hopped over to it. She also had found a match. "Ooooo what's this do?" She struck the match and dropped it on the barrel.

There was a loud BOOM and Jack finally joined the crew on deck only to wince. Jordan sat on the ground with a blackened face, charred hair and swirly eyes. Gibbs had a pained face on. "That was the last of our rum!" Everyone on bored the Black Pearl went to sleep crying that night.

But seeing as it isn't night time yet. Jordan got to do more destructive things.

Jack watched as everyone walked back to their duties sulking, some even sobbing. He knew how they felt but slowly walked over to the red head. "Why'd ye do that there mate?"

Jordan still had swirly eyes but looked up at Jack with a goofy grin. "Dude…that was sooo much fun…lets do it again!" she tried to stand up but was unable to keep her balance and fell over again.

Deciding that it was for her own good (and the rest of the crew) Jack looked around for something to knock her out with and found a board that would do nicely.

He was about to whap her over the head with it when Draca the Halfdragon appeared and ripped it out of his hands.

"Bad Jack! No one is allowed to hit the authoress's best friend!" she snarled at him. Jack blinked in confusion and Jordan giggled.

"Dude Brittney is that like you?" Jordan poked Draca's tail.

"No! Well…erm…maybe….uh…yeah…NOW STOP POKING MY TAIL!" Draca (aka: Brittney in her authoress form) yanked her tail away from Jordan.

"But Br-" Draca glared at Jordan, "…I mean, but Draca, I didn't know that you were half dragon and had a tail and wings and …other stuff that isn't as important as those."

Draca smacked her face. "I'm not even supposed to be IN this story you idiot!" With that she pulled out some smoke bomb things and threw them on the ground and disappeared as the smoke covered her body.

Jordan and Jack both coughed and waved the smoke out of their faces. Suddenly both of them couldn't remember what had taken place only moments before. Jack looked around in utter confusion. "What the bloody heck just happened?"

Jordan scratched her head and also looked around. "I have no clue dude."

XxX

**A/N: I'm like having so much fun writing this XD**

**Jordan: I'm sure you are….**

**Me: well…You're having fun writing it too!**

**Jordan: yeah…..about that….**

**Me: clicky purple button please and leave message….AND CANDY –runs around again-**

**Jordan: -sigh- Please R&R Thank you.**


	3. iPod obessing is teh fun

**A/N: BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Here is chapter three mates! (sorry if it isn't as funny as the last two…but you'd have a hard time too if you were on the Flying Dutchman and in the brig! XD)**

**DarkPredatorPrincess: -tries to grab the chocolate from you- must…have…sugary…goodness! Oo heheh…I'm glad that you like the story…-tries to grab chocolate once again- CHOCOLATE!**

**Jennaalissa: Woo hoo! More good ol' crazah peoples! Yay! -Does a happy jig- and here is chapter 3 for you…savvy? XD**

**SappireLight: CANDY! CandyCandyCandy! Yay! -Takes it and eats it- yum X3 I'm very glad that you like this story soo much XD**

**Disclaimer: -struggles inwardly- mustn't….no…NEVER…! –runs off and Jordan walks on stage- Jordan: -sigh- Draca doesn't own Pirates but really really wishes that she did, savvy?**

CHAPTER 3 AND A BOTTLE OF RUM! (Not really lol XD)

Brittney woke up finally and rubbed her head. "Wow…I had the best dream of my entire life…for a second there I thought it was….WOW HOLD THE PHONE!"

The brunette looked from side to side and noticed that she was in a cell.

Slowly her brain began to take function of the situation and began concocting a plan of escape…

Brittney put her headphones on and turned her iPod onto her favorite album. Grinning madly she stood up and began do dance around while singing quiet loudly.

On deck, everyone on the Flying Dutchman had to cover their ears because of Brittney's horrible singing.

Davy growled angrily and turned to Sharky. "Go shut that girl up now!" Sharky nodded and headed to the brig but shuddered as the singing got louder.

"HEY! SHUT UP WILL YOU!"

Brittney stopped in an odd dance position and stared at the guy. "WHAT? I CAN"T HEAR YOU?" Sharky winced again and Brittney took her headphones off looking completely innocent. "Did I do something wrong Sir?"

Sharky's one eye twitched and he yanked her iPod away from her through the bars of the cell.

Brittney's eyes went wide and she began to foam at the mouth. "Give. Me. Back. The. iPod. And. No. One. Gets. Hurt!" her eye twitched and she continued to stare at Sharky. Sharky slowly backed away with scared eyes.

The iPod crazed brunette snarled and jumped at the bars of her cage like a wild animal. Sharky screamed and ran back up to the deck…unfortunately he still had Brittney's iPod.

Brittney screamed and randomly sat on the floor while twiddling her thumbs. "They hurt my iPod and there will be more than just heck to pay." Both of her eyes twitched then she curled up into a beetle position.

"THEY CAN'T KEEP ME HERE FOREVER!" With that she hoped back up and banged on the door of her cell with a coffee mug that seemed to appear out of no where. "Leme' out now! I deserve a fair trial you foo's!" she continued to bang her cup against the bars.

Davy growled and marched down to the brig where the girl was being held. He watched her with cold eyes as she continued to bang the cup against the bars. "Will ye stop it already!" he growled loudly at her.

Brittney dropped the cup and stared at Davy like a deer caught in headlights. Her mouth opened and she gapped like a fish for a few minutes until Davy got annoyed and hit the bars of her cage with his claw. The brunette shrieked and fell backwards onto her butt for the second time that day. Swearing like a sailor, Brittney rubbed her bum again and then began to pout at noting in particular.

Davy glared down at her then turned to leave. Brittney jumped up. "NOOO! If u leave u have ta die!" She proclaimed while wearing what happened to look like a gangster costume. Davy whipped around and glared at her again with icy eyes.

Draca suddenly pops in with an angered face. "This is T-rated! No gangsters!" Draca snapped her fingers and Brittney's outfit turned back into the one that she was originally wearing.

Brittney growled and pouted. "How can you do this? I'm you!"

Draca sighed angrily, "How many times do I have to tell you people I'm not supposed to even BE IN this story!" The authoress made some funny kun-fuu moves then disappeared.

Brittney sobbed miserably. "But they took iPod away!"

Poor Davy was no longer glaring but looking at her in jinormous confusion. "Story? iPod? T-rated?"

Brittney looked at Davy hopefully. "Will you save my iPod from Sharky man?" Davy blinked and arched a brow.

Sharky man?

Taking the utter silence as a no, Brittney sobbed in defeat. "NOOO! I'll never see my baby again WAHHH!"

Davy rolled his eyes knowing that he was going to regret this and opened up the crazy girl's cage. Brittney blinked then punched a fist into the air. "VICKORY! Now…" she grinned menacingly, "…to find a certain fish-man…"

The girl marched past Davy and went up to the deck.

Everyone stared at her and she scanned them all over. None of them had a shark head. Growling, Brittney went below deck and found her man…er…guy fishy person…playing Lairs Dice. Fist's clenched in fury that someone had touched her iPod, she march over to him and slapped him hard across the face.

"Give me the iPod or face my wrath!" her blue eyes sparked dangerously. One of the sparks landed on Sharky's face and he wince, his face as full of fear as it could get. Everyone else was just laughing at him.

Slowly, Sharky handed the iPod to her, even though he had no idea what it was but just guessed, and ran off screaming like a little girl.

Brittney ignored everyone as she hugged her iPod with a very happy face. "Oh my baby! I'll never ever let you go again, no I won't!" she crooned like a mother would to a child.

Everyone took a few steps away from the girl with weirded out faces.

Brittney clipped her iPod back onto her belt and proudly walked back out onto the deck.

When she got up there though…a bar of soap magically appeared under her foot. Brittney screamed as she began to slide aground the deck of the ship until she finally crashed into the mast. Brittney slowly peeled away from the mast with xs for eyes and a nose bleed. And best of all…to add insult upon injury…Davy was watching the entire thing.

He picked her up and slung her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Brittney made an eep and began to pound her fists into his back. "THIS IS UNDIGNIFIED! UNHAND ME….wait…no! Don't unhand me!" She squeaked and clung to his coat. Davy rolled his eyes and set her down. Brittney mumbled hotly but let him go anyway.

"So tell me…how did you manage to fall from the sky right onto my ship?" Davy looked at her with icy blue eyes.

Brittney put a finger to her chin in thought, and then grinned goofily up at him, "Me no hear you say please."

Davy narrowed his eyes. "Now lass!" he growled.

"Ok, ok! Jeez, don't have a cow!" the girl gave him a goofy version of his own glare.

Brittney then took a deep breath, "Well you see; me and Jordan, my bestest friend in the entire world, were making plans to take over Russia while she was visiting my house…soon we got bored with the plans to take over Russia and she asked me what I wanted to do but I told her that I didn't know and then asked her what she wanted to do and she suggested that we play Pirates but I said a whole lot of logical things in a very sarcastic way and she began to pout so I agreed on two conditions of we play it outside and that I could bring my iPod with me, she thinks that I'm obsessed with the thing, and we both went outside only to fall into this big hole that was in front of my house, then I landed not so nicely on this ship and I have no idea what happened to her." Brittney's face had started to turn blue and she took a biiiiiig gulp of air.

Davy stared long and hard and the brunette in front of him. He blinked once then noticed that she wasn't there anymore. Looking around he spotted her by one of the canons.

Brittney's eyes were full of playful mischief as she stared at the canon. "I want to touch it…" Slowly she poked it with her finger then pulled it sharply away. When it didn't attack her or anything like that, Brittney grinned madly and poked it continually while saying happily, "I like Shiny!"

If Davy had been animated, there would be a sweat drop next to his head right about now.

XxX

**A/N: -is bouncing off the walls from sugar overload- want. More. SUGAR! NEED MORE CHOCOLATY GOODNESS! **

**Jordan: -sweat drops- um…hey thanks for reviewing and reading everyone.**

**Me: Muwhahahahahahahaha! Click teh purple button of DOOM! Leave Messages and Candy! **

**Jordan: -scolds- and what do we say to the people who just might do that?**

**Me: um…savvy?**

**Jordan: -smacks face- no you say please.**

**Me: OOOOOOh!**

**Jordan: -looks to readers- Read and review please and thanks. –goes off to knock the hyper authoress out-**


	4. Not the rum!

**A/N: -Is about to say something but gets hit in the head with a fish-**

**Jordan: -stares at the now unconscious authoress- well…I guess I'll be doing the thank you's and stuff…Well anyway Draca apologies ahead of time if you all don't think that this chapter is funny enough. She is taking suggestions though.**

**Jordan: Ok here we go…**

**Me: HI AGAIN!**

**Jordan: -sweat drop- **

**Dunedain Rose Thorn: -stares at the huge sack of candy with big eyes- must have…CANDY! XD I'm very glad that you like it!**

**James'-gurl7492: Yay I'm glad! And thank you! –Grabs the bag of candy and eats the entire thing- yummy! XD**

**SappireLight: Yes iPod crazyness! Thank you…I'm very glad that you like this story so much! -Takes candy and eats it happily- no one will know CX**

**My Life Craves Pirates: Lemme just say this first…I LOVE YOUR NAME lol! Yeah…you'd think that Sharky would be scarier but no one is scarier then someone who is obsessed with their iPod XD. Yay for random hyper crap and stuff! XD!**

**Jennaalissa: Oooo still giggling? Yes! I have done something right for once score! -Happy face- can I havy my one piece of candy now? –Puppy dog eyes-**

**DarkPredatorPrincess: -sobs- chocolate! Need! –reaches for it again- Glad you like teh shiny XD and thanks!**

**Jordan: No Draca doesn't own Pirates -there is a peircing cry of anguish in the background- but she really wishes that she did, savvy?**

CHAPTER 4 WHOO HOO! XD

Jordan sat on Jack's bed with a bored face on.

Jack had tied her up after she blew up the storage room that held all the rum bottles. Jordan pouted, "I thought all the bottles were empty! It wasn't my fault that they had a secret stash of rum in there!"

She drummed her fingers on the bed, trying to think of something that would keep her entertained but sadly nothing came to mind.

The red head screamed, she couldn't take it anymore. She jumped up from the bed and began pacing in fast circles. Jordan got a little too dizzy really fast so she had to stop pacing.

Everything swirled around, and Jordan bumped into Jack's desk. "Ouch!" Jordan looked down and saw two things that made her day; something that looked like paper and something that looked like a pencil.

"YES!" She plopped down in Jack's chair and picked up the pencil with a ear to ear grin and began to doodle on the paper.

Jack was on deck with the crew when he got a very bad feeling in his gut.

He excused himself from the conversation that he and Mr. Gibbs were having and slowly walked to his cabin. He opened the door and looked in.

The girl sat at his desk, scribbling at something furiously with a happy look on her face.

Jack debated weather to see what she WAS doing or just ignore her. He chose the earlier and slowly walked into the room.

Jordan was so focused on her drawing that she didn't even hear him when he tripped over his own feet and fell loudly on the ground…not to mention all the swearing that was involved on Jack's part.

Jack got back up and walked over to her.

Jordan set the pencil down with satisfaction and looked over her drawing. Little did she know that someone was behind her…

(Cheesy Jaws Theme plays here X3)

A hand slowly reached for her shoulder and……

"Oi! What are ye doing in me chair?"

Jordan jump a few feet in the air, landed, grabbed her picture, and ran for the bed.

Jack stared at her as she jumped onto the bed then looked at him with round eyes. Jordan then gave him a goofy smile, "Oh…eh-heh…it's just you Jack…"

Jack eyed the piece of paper that she was holding. "What's that mate?"

Confused, the red head looked down at the paper that she was holding. "Oh this? Well…it's uh…nothing…" she mumbled something else at the very end and Jack frowned.

"Beg your pardon?"

"It's just a drawing that I did." Jordan said a little louder.

Jack grinned at her like only Jack could. "And what pray tell is this drawing of?" Jordan blinked and opened her mouth to respond but then closed it looking very confused. "I…it's a ---- of…hey wait…"

Jack noticed that she had only mouthed the word between a and of. "What was that?"

Jordan frowned, "I can't say the word ----- for some reason…"

Suddenly a Dusk from Kingdom Hearts 2 fly's by.

Jordan's eyes went wide. "Like omfg! It's a Dusk from KH 2! SWEET!" Jack had the "ok I'm creeped out again" face on as he looked back at Jordan.

Jordan then pulled out a key blade and began to smash the Dusk into bits and pieces.

Jack made another face. This was just all too weird for him to handle…and he thought that he'd seen everything before…

The Dusk had been taken care of and Jordan hopped back onto the bed where her picture was resting. "Well anywho, before the Dusk appeared, I was saying that it was a photo of ….oooo cool I can say photo again! Woot!" Jordan did a miniature happy dance.

Jack rolled his eyes and sighed. There was no point to this girl at all. "Well...erm…you should get some sleep…it's getting late…"

The girl looked at him with a smile. "But Jordan too hyper to sle-" she didn't even get to finish her last word when she flopped over onto the pillow sound asleep. Jack poked her to make sure that she was asleep then ran out of the room.

"Is the lass asleep?" Mr. Gibbs asked.

Jack nodded. "Time to go to Tortuga and fast…before she wakes up and notices that we're going off to get more rum…"

Mr. Gibbs agreed full heartedly and got the crew going again. They all moaned sense it was night time but they did agree with what Jack had said.

A few hours (I think …) later they had made port at Tortuga and gotten some more rum. As they all loaded the barrels and bottles onto the ship, they failed to notice a certain red haired girl watching them from the shadows.

Jack wasn't paying any attention and literally jumped about 30 feet in the air while screaming when he felt someone poke his side.

Jordan burst into uncontrollable laughter as Jack came crashing back down to the ground. Jack groaned with the rest of the crew. "Oi! I told you not to do that!"

Jordan continued to laugh. "Aye you did but you didn't say that I couldn't poke you to scare you!"

He growled and pushed himself up into a sitting position and Mr. Gibbs helped him stand up. Jordan had stopped laughing and was now watching them all with an innocent face. "So what cha all doin'?"

The crew gave Jack nervous looks and he grimaced. "We're…um…just loading up some supplies luv."

Jordan gave him puppy dog eyes, "Can I help? Pretty pleeeeasssee?"

"NO!"

Jordan blinked, everyone including Jack had said that and they all looked a little worried.

Jack chuckled nervously, "Um…what we mean is that this is very heavy and fragile stuff luv…and we don't want you to get hurt." The red head knew that he was lying and she pouted with a scowl on her face.

The captain patted her on the head and gave her an uneasy smile. "You should probably go back to the room…"

Jordan gave him a look that said "sure yeah whatever…" as she walked back to his cabin.

As she walked in though…the same bar of soap that attacked Brittney got Jordan.

She screamed as she began to slide around the deck then she slid down to the room where they were putting the rum.

Just as they were about to close the door. Jordan zoomed right pasted them on the bar of soap and right into the room. The force of her passing made the door close and everyone winced as they heard the breaking of glass and barrels.

Everything went silent for a few seconds then Jack slowly opened the door to find the most horrifying sight.

Jordan lay in a pile of broken barrels with swirly eyes. Rum lay on the floor in useless puddles, broken glass and wood was tossed everywhere, steam even rose up from the murdered barrels of rum like as though this room had been turned into a battle field. The only survivor happened to be a bottle that was teetering on the edge of the shelf above Jordan's head.

"Oh bugger."

The bottle fell just as Jordan started to get her bearings back. It smashed onto her head and she went limp with X's for eyes and drool coming out of the side of her mouth.

Jack noted that everyone was staring at him angrily. He chuckled uneasily, "Well…um…at least she's out cold…savvy?"

Jordan was then taken back to Jack's room and was tied down to the bed whilst everyone else went to sleep crying their eyes out over their poor rum that never had a chance.

XxX

**A/N: CANDY candycandycandycandy! –Runs off in the background still screaming hyperly about candy-**

**Jordan: ….ok…well like I said before…Draca is taking suggestions for what some chapters should be about so don't be afraid to speak your mind…**

**Me: -pops up in front of her and screams at the camera- I LIKE CANDY! –Is knocked out with a fish again-**

**Me: X . x**

**Jordan: -smiles- Kindly read and review please and thanks.**


	5. Chocolate and Rum are a dangerous thing

**A/N: -jumps up and down in her seat- wheeeee! I'm chocolate hyper! I love being hyper don't you? Being hyper is fuuuu- -gets hit in the head with a brick-**

**Jordan: Trust me I just saved you from a page long speech about how being hyper is fun. From here on I will be talking…**

**Me: -pops back up- NOOO! YOU TRY AND STEAL MY CANDY!**

**Jordan: -sigh- fine.**

**SappireLight: Yay me like KH2 as well! XD -takes bag of candy and hugs it- ahh my precious…-eats it- num! thank you!**

**Jennaalissa: Great Idea! I love it! My brain is already thinking up of the next chapter with that in it XD thanks! -eats piece of candy with a happy face-**

**Nerd's United: I've never played Final Fantasy before. I much prefer Kingdom Hearts X3 AND OMG I LIKE TOTALLY UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU"RE SAYING ABOUT SORA AND KAIRI! -looks around nervously to make sure that people with nets aren't going to come after me then grins- I'm not giving you that kind of look I'm giving you the "Omg-someone-that-is-just-as-hyper-as-me-and-stuff-and-likes-KH-just-as-much-as-I-do-who-also-agrees-about-the-whole-Kairi-Sora-and-Riku-thing-and-omg-this-person-rules!" Look. XD Thanks and I'm glad you liketh it.**

**James'-gurl7492: -stares up at the bag of candy with wide eyes- I have died and gone to candy heaven! –glomps the bag with the happiest face on and begins to eat the candy inside- Glad you thought that it was funny! Hope you say the same about this one XD**

**Dunedain Rose Thorn: Yes the evil bar of soap MUHAHAHAHAHAHA! -cough- yeah poor rum XD I'm very glad that you like the story! -suddenly stares at the bag of candy- MORE SUGARY GOODNESS! -somehow eat's it all in one bite- thankies!**

**Jordan: Once again Draca doesn't own Pirates or Happy Snicker Doodles savvy?**

**Me: Oh wait! I must say that I hope you all find this chapter funny enough - ok now to the story!**

"YO HO YO HO A PIRATE"S LIFE FOR ME!"

Davy twitched in annoyance as everyone stopped what they were doing to glare at her. "BACK TO WORK!" Everyone jumped at his voice and rushed about to do their jobs.

"Mr. Turner, I have a job for you." Davy snapped at Bootstrap Bill Turner. Bill looked at his Captain. "Aye sir?"

Davy pointed his claw up at Brittney. "Get 'er down from there and then do something to keep her entertained and out of my way!"

Bill watched Brittney as she continued to sing and swing from the mast. "Aye…Captain…"

Suddenly Brittney jumped down and landed in-between the two of them. "What cha doin'? Talkin' bout me? Huh huh are yah?" She bounced up and down while grinning at the two pirates.

Davy arched a brow at Bill, "Good luck…ye going to need it."

Bill slumped his shoulders in defeat and sighed as Brittney buzzed around him like a hyper active bee.

A few hours later, Davy decided to check on them to make sure that the girl hadn't killed Bill (hahahaha Kill Bill…get it? ….I thought not….lol)

He walked below deck and found both Brittney and Bill staring hard at a board with small coins on it. Brittney picked one up and made it move all the way to Bill's side of the board. "Woot! King me baby!"

Davy watched as Bill swore and put another coin on top of the one that she had moved. "What are ye playing?"

Brittney looked up and grinned at Davy. "Hey! Davy mah man! Come! Play checkers with us!" Bill's head snapped up and he looked sheepishly at his Captain.

Davy frowned. "I think I'll pass on that there little missy."

The brunette pouted. "I do have a name you know! And it's not Little Missy. It's Brittney!" she declared but then stopped confused. "….well…I think that it's Brittney…but suddenly I'm not sure…"

Both Bill and Davy stared at the girl as she pondered upon her name.

Brittney thought for a second longer then smiled. "Happy snicker doodles!"

Suddenly they all became animated and both men fell over in an anime style. Everything then returns to normal.

Davy twitched. "Happy snicker doodles had nothing to do with what you were talking about!"

Brittney blinked and pointed behind them. "No really…Happy snicker doodles."

Bill was the first to look behind him and he froze. Horror was written all over his face as he tapped his captain on the shoulder. Davy then turned around and stared in disbelief at what stood behind them.

It was a HUGE snickers bar with a smiley face doodled on it. As well as arms and lets.

"Will you be my friend?" It said in a nerdish voice.

Brittney glomped it. "I'll be your friend!"

The snickers bar danced around happily. "YAY, I have a-OW!" Brittney had taken a big bite out of the delicious candy bar.

"Mmmm…ack wait!" Brittney frowned and looked down into the candy bar to find it filled to the brim with…dun-nun!

RUM!

Brittney looked at it for a long time then shrugged. "Oh well. There's still chocolate on it so…" she took another big bite.

Bill had long sense ran off to leave Davy along with the hyper active girl.

He watched as she ate the entire snickers bar and sat there with a content look on her face…not to mention a drunken one.

"Likessss omg thatssss ssOoos cOoL duDesss…" her speech was greatly slurred and she giggled like a maniac. Davy just stared at her as she continued to giggle.

Suddenly Brittney jumped up with a spastic hyper look on her face. "WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" she shouted as she ran around the room almost literally bouncing off the walls.

Davy was actually starting to get a little freaked out now.

"YO HO YO HO A PIRATES LIFE FOR ME!" She yelled and span around in circles. Davy slowly walked over to her and stopped her. She was swaying back and forth. "That was soooo much FUN!" she grinned madly. "I'm going to tell everyone!" She ran off to the deck.

Davy blinked. "Wait…tell everyone what?" Suddenly he heard drunken shouts and hyper active laughter from above. Slowly he moved towards the stairs with a feeling of dread.

Sure enough when he got up there…everyone on his crew was hyper and drunk…just like Brittney.

Davy spotted her and a group of his men standing on barrels while holding mugs of who knows what while singing a really loud and bad version of "Pirates' Life for Me".

Davy grabbed Brittney and pulled her away from everyone. Brittney gave everyone a drunken grin. "Hey yawl I'll be back! It was wonderful to have you here will me my children!"

Brittney was dragged into Davy's room and thrown onto the bed. Davy looked down at the girl with a hard glare. "What in bloody hell did you do to my crew?" His tone was harsh.

The brunette stared up at him with a grin. "I just gave em somethin' to drink mate."

Davy's eyes narrowed. "And what was it that ye gave them to drink?"

Brittney snuggled her head into the pillow then looked slyly up at him before she fell asleep.

"Rum and chocolate mate. Rum and chocolate."

XxX

**A/N: -is running around and is smacking random people with a dead fish- WHEEEEEEEEEEEE—**

**Jordan: Thank you for all the candy –smiles at the reviewers-**

**Me: AND THE CANDY!**

**Jordan: Draca I already said that.**

**Me: oh….**

**Jordan: -smiles- Please read and review.**


	6. Evil soap part one

**A/N: -is bouncing in her seat while tied up- thankyouallforthecandyitwassogoodandstuff!**

**Jordan: ok…that's enough candy for you...**

**Me: NEVER! –Looks to reviewers- chappy is short because I was writing it on the fly so me hopie that you enjoy…and leave more candy! XD**

**SappireLight: Glad you liked it XD Yay more candy! –Eats- XD**

**Jennaalissa: Huh…now that I think about it yeah…you're right lol. Oooo! Hyper Will…I'll have to put that in there somewhere XD thankies! -takes the candy and does a happy dance- oh and btw…this chapter and the next are dedicated to your Idea with the evil bar of soap XD so tips to you!**

**Nerd's United: Nop I have not. I'm glad you like the story a lot rofl! And yes it would be bad if you had to kill me O.o Bwhahahahahahaha! May the day be cursed by we who are consumed by Pirates XD**

**Yuko6754: Yay I'm glad you like so far XD –eats candy- hehehe!**

**Dunedain Rose Thorn: Yay you are the only person who got the Kill bill thing rofl! Yay! -takes both bags of candy with a happy face- Glad you liked the last chapter and I hope you like this one just as much XD**

**Jordan: Draca doesn't own Pirates…aw come on people you know the drill. –huff-**

CHAPTER 6 MATE XD

It is now the second day that Jordan has been upon the Black Pearl and already everyone one never wants to see her near rum ever again.

We now switch our attention to an innocent bar of soap that is innocently sitting on the deck of the Black Pearl.

We now switch our attention to Jack.

He peeked into the room to make sure that Jordan was still tied down to the bed. Jack was also happy to see that she was still out cold from last nights…ehem…war.

Jack closed the door with a sigh and turned his attention back to his crew.

The bar of soap saw its chance.

It seemed to innocently slide over to where Jack was walking and innocently stop right in front of him.

Mr. Gibbs then called out to Jack. The captain turned around and began to walk away from where the innocent bar of soap wanted him to go. The bar so soap sighed but it was not yet defeated!

It slid over to the cabin room where Jordan was and noticed happily that she was awake.

Jordan noticed that she was tied down. "Ftw? Why am I tied down?" she wiggled and tried to get free but with no avail. Two beady eyes stared at her as she tried again and failed.

"I am here' to help zyou." A voice with a really bad fake French accent said.

Jordan's head whipped around. "Like…who said that?"

Suddenly a fish wearing a mustache and some French cloths hopped up onto the bed and began to bite the ropes off of the red head. Jordan's eyes went wide. "OMG! A French fish secret agent! I KNEW you existed! Are you here on a secret mission to free me even though it's not so secret anymore sense I know what the mission is even though it's a secret even though you never told me what you are here to do, oh wait yeah you did and like wow I should've fallen into the Pirates world a LONG time ago and-"

The fish shhhh-ed her. "Do zyou want me to beh captured?" Jordan wisely shut up not wanting to be tied to the bed any longer and let the fish do his job.

The fish finished the disappeared. "Erm…thanks fishy guy…" the red head got up off of the bed and began to stretch.

Little did she know that the fish was working for the bar of soap.

Jack had a bad feeling and looked behind him. He saw the door to his room open and Jordan walking about…conscious and untied. "NO!" He waved his arms franticly and raced to his room. The bar of soap was waiting for him.

Jack's foot slipped on something and he began to slide around the deck. Everyone watched him as he flailed his arms and screamed loudly. He crashed into the mast but seemed to keep sliding around somehow after that. Jack slid right into the steering wheel and began to spin around on that. It shot him up into the air and he screamed again. "OI I'M GONNA BE SIIIIICKKK!"

Jack smacked his head on the upper part of the mast and began to spin head over heels in the air. He landed on his feet but sadly one of them happened to land on the bar of soap again. "Oh BUGGER!" Jack gulped then yelled as he began the crazy cycle once again.

Jordan was standing in front of the doorway. "Hey what's going on---YIKES!" Jack slid right into Jordan. She screamed and clung to him as she began to slide around with him. They slid around on deck for a bit longer until they both slid right off the deck and into the water.

Mr. Gibbs looked over the rail.

Jack was bobbing in the water with Jordan clinging to him with a frozen terrified look on her face.

"…Captain? Are ye alright?"

Jack looked up at Gibbs. "Aye I'm fine…but I have one little request…"

Mr. Gibbs nodded and seemed to look like he was listening intently. But he really didn't need to for this next part.

"GET ME THE BLOODY HECK BACK ON THAT DECK! AND GET ME HAT!" Mr. Gibbs pulled his head back in surprise at how loud Jack was but heard him none the less.

In a matter of minutes a very wet Jack and Jordan where back on board and so was Jack's hat. Jordan still clung to him like a terrified cat and he tried to get her off of him but she wouldn't budge.

Jack sighed. "This is going to be a very long day…"

"HI JACK!"

Jack screamed and jumped out of his boots.

Jordan watched him fall back to the deck. The fake Jordan still clinging to him.

Jack looked at the Jordan that was clinging to him then to the one who scared him. "Oi! What's going on?" Jordan pulled the other Jordan off of Jack.

"It's my decoy incase something bad happens. Good thing that I set it in front of the door when I did other wise I'd be all soaking wet just like you." She smiled and threw the fake behind her.

It hit Tom Cruise on the head and he fell into the water. As for the story of how Tom Cruise came to be on the Black Pearl…if anyone was to tell the story then he'd have to put a curse on them with his witch craft.

Back to the point though…

Jack frowned up at Jordan then lay back down. "Mr. Gibbs."

"Aye Captain'?"

Jack looked up at the older pirate. "Get me some rum."

Mr. Gibbs shifted uneasily and Jordan watched them both with great interest.

"Uh Captin'…there is no rum…"

Jack moaned and banged his head on the deck. "Why –bang- is –bang- the –bang- rum –bang- always –bang- gone? –bang-" he then looked at Jordan as she began to play with a match that she had found only to have it blow up in her face…some how…

"Oh…That's why…"

We switch our attention once again to the now not so innocent bar of soap. It had lost the battle but not the war! Its mission to clean was still in full motion! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA! The bar of soap grinned (even though it doesn't have a mouth) and knew what it had to do…it had to go back to its very first victim! Perhaps it would with the battle there.

So that is the half of the story of the now not so innocent but yet evil sounding bar of soap that seems to fight for a clean world but so far has just been making people slip all over the place for no apparent reason other than it's own amusement and I wonder what's on today's menu maybe fish like that French fish that helped Jordan escape but turned out to be working for the bar of soap and I wonder how that really ever worked out seeing as the fish never really got paid and the now not so innocent but yet evil sounding bar of soap that seems to fight for a clean world but so far has just been making people slip all over the place for no apparent reason other than it's own amusement can't really talk and- (a brick is thrown at the authoresses head and she is knocked out cold)

XxX

**Jordan: um….-pokes the authoress with a stick- well…I guess I'll take it from here…**

**Thank you all for reading and reviewing and…um…leaving Draca lots and lots of candy to keep her hyper active mind random enough to come up with the chapter's for this story…so uh…**

**Please r&r thanks **


End file.
